The November 06 issue of details showed up today, and their advice is questionable as ever. You’ll remember that I don’t have a very high opinion of that magazine, and you’re probably wondering why I was reading it in the first place.
Well, I was eating lunch, and all the other magazines were upstairs. So, yeah.
Anyway, one article that caught my attention was entitled You’re a Boss, Not a Buddy, and covered the transition from fellow coworker to supervisor. For the most part, it was full of good points about how the writer tried to be a “cool boss” and ended up not being much of a boss at all. What I had to take issue with, so much so that I’m writing a damn post about it, was the sidebar, AKA “The Power Playbook,” a list of 10 ways to be a good boss and advance yourself up the ranks of executivity. From the article I get the impression that this is advice for bosses regarding their immediate employees; not, for example, a CEO vs. an intern. There are a couple decent points, but c’mon:
[Asshole Boss Tip] #2: Stay just out of reach
Let the tyros get carpal tunnel from their BlackBerries. The truly powerful are minimally available, and even then to only a select few.
Wait, what? So your immediate subordinates should have no way to run things by you when they have questions? Then what? You reprimand them for not consulting you? Asshole.
[Asshole Boss Tip] #4: Freeze out the new kids
Teach entry-levels the hierarchy by studiously ignoring them. You’ll motivate them to prove themselves worthy of your time.
No. You’ll motivate them to find work elsewhere. Asshole.
[Asshole Boss Tip] #6: Forget details
Take a cue from your grandmother and occasionally lapse on rookies’ names…
“Where’s what’s-his-face? Oh, he quit?” Asshole.
[Asshole Boss Tip] #10: Be cryptic
A terse e-mail—more William Carlos Willams than Willam Wordsworth—isn’t just a time-saver, it’s a mindfuck. A three-word reply will resonate much more deeply than a lengthy treatise.
Wow. So apparently you’re employees aren’t getting frustrated enough by their clients or customers who think this kind of communication is appropriate, you thought you’d join in too. Goes great with #2. ASS. HOLE.
I have been lucky not to have any bosses like this, but I feel really sorry right now for people who report to those who take details seriously.