The modern comeback is an inevitable and infinitely useful in the skill of conversation and arguments. Need some help on yours? Try these, no charge:

That’s what she said.
A classic. Works for pretty much everything, and is even funnier if backed up by a recent viewing of the America’s Next Top Model skit on SNL. Probably the best one if your goal is to irritate the hell out of the person you’re interacting with.

Did your mom tell you to say that?
Probably also a classic – perfect for that personal touch; intersperse with with the aforementioned “That’s what she said” and you’ll be winning the argument in no time.

You don’t know (said in an accusatory tone).
For a new-wave twist, try this one, developed and tested right here in Wausau. You’ll be surprised how well it works.

Any other suggestions? Speak up.